🌿🌿 My Only Purpose in Writing This… 🌿🌿
The only reason I am sharing my story is to help others avoid the mistakes I made because of pride and ego.
This is not a fake story — every word is true.
✍🏻 I am a working woman, Alhamdulillah, serving in Grade 18 in the Education Department.
I am also a mother of two children — and unfortunately, a divorced woman.
Women are emotional, and sometimes emotions make us take decisions we should not take.
We should learn to control our feelings.
I am 37 years old now. I got married when I was 28 years old.
My marriage was within the family. My husband was also a government employee in Grade 15 in the Health Department.
We lived in a joint family before the birth of my first child, a son.
Their family was good. They never troubled me.
But my heart never wanted to live in a joint family.
I told my husband, “Let’s make our own house. We both earn enough. We can build a house in one year. Even if we sell the car, we will build the house first.”
He agreed.
I bought the plot from my savings.
Together, in one year, we built our home.
My salary was higher than his.
After we moved into our new house, small problems started — like in every home.
But I made my job my biggest pride, and that pride became the biggest foolish mistake of my life.
Then my daughter was born.
And remember one thing:
Sometimes a woman’s biggest enemy is another woman.
Not every man harms you as much as a woman can.
Because I spent more money on the house, I started taunting him:
“This house was built mostly with my money. What did you even do?”
From here, everything started breaking.
My cousin—who used to visit me often—poisoned my mind.
She said, “You earn more than him. Why are you living like this?”
She kept filling my heart with negativity until I even forgot my children.
I forgot that I was a mother.
Fights increased.
Even the car we bought — I had contributed more.
One day, I said something horrible:
“Either return my money, or you won’t use the car from today.”
He sold the car and returned my money.
His elder brother lived in Canada.
He visited us for three months.
When he went back, he took that car with him.
My ego was so high that I couldn’t handle it.
I demanded that my husband return all the money I had spent on the house.
(Truth is, I asked for the money because I had already decided to take khula, influenced by my cousin’s sweet lies.)
My husband sold the car again, returned all my money, left his government job, and started a small business.
He opened a hotel.
Today, he owns three hotels.
And I, full of ego, became a psychological patient.
When I got the money, I demanded divorce.
My husband and my family tried to stop me, but I didn’t listen.
Because I was completely blinded by my cousin’s words.
She told me her devar was a Major in the Army, his wife had died, he had a daughter, and he wanted to marry me.
I got greedy for a higher-status marriage and divorced my husband.
My second biggest mistake.
He divorced me on one condition:
“You will not take the children.”
I agreed.
Just for greed.
And I lost my children.
My ego was so high that I couldn’t handle it.
After my iddah, my cousin arranged my second marriage with her devar.
I stayed there for four months.
I worked, but they took all my salary.
Their house was huge, they had cars and drivers,
But I travelled in rickshaws.
I left my own children but took care of his child.
No peace, only mental torture.
And that same cousin who destroyed my home now treated me like I was her enemy.
After 11 months, I found out that he was already married secretly in Islamabad.
I still tried to save the marriage, but he kept torturing me, forcing me to ask for divorce.
One day, my father said,
“Enough. Come back home. Don’t destroy your life anymore.”
I received a second divorce.
I returned to my parents.
Two months ago, my father passed away — the only support I had.
My brothers are married, busy in their own lives.
I still have my government job — the job I was once so proud of.
Now it gives me no comfort.
Yes, salary comes, but where do I spend it?
There is no peace.
Today, I saw my children.
I bought them small gifts and toys.
Their father sent the gifts back through the younger child.
They are happy with their stepmother.
My only wish now is:
If my husband gives me my children back, maybe this depression will end.
Maybe I will live again.
Maybe I will heal.
Please pray for me.
I know I made terrible mistakes.
But nothing is impossible for Allah.
—
My Advice to All Working Women
Whether you work in the government or private sector…
Whether your salary is more or less…
Never let your job or money become your ego.
Money cannot buy peace.
Money cannot buy happiness.
Money cannot build a home — only love, patience, and respect can.
My younger sister is a doctor.
Her husband works a private job.
They work together, support each other, and live with love.
When I see them, I hate the decisions I made.
Why did I do this to myself?
Yes, many men are wrong — but many women also destroy their own homes because of ego, pride, and jealousy.
And remember:
Never trust another woman blindly.
Do not destroy your home because of someone’s advice.
Life has taught me this very painfully:
A woman is incomplete without a man,
and a man is incomplete without a woman.
Family — husband, wife, children — this is the real happiness.
Nothing else.
This society always blames a divorced woman, no matter how good she is.
May Allah bless every daughter and sister with good fortune.
May Allah protect all of us from pride and ego.
Please pray for me.
If Allah does not show me a better path soon, I fear I may even lose my job because of my mental condition.
—
And About Childhood…
Summer today doesn’t feel like the summers of childhood.
No laughter in the streets.
No running back home to drink water and rushing out again.
No games of hide-and-seek.
No carefree happiness.
Everything is replaced by buildings and roads.
Childhood had no weight, no emptiness, no loneliness.
Now only silence remains…
and memories.